A Healer For The Healer
Last night, I went to see someone whose name was like Haniel, for a massage. I like a deep massage, to get the tension and knots out of my muscles.
I asked if he was from Hawaii? The name like Haniel was very almost Hawaiian–Hanani.
It is the name of a Spanish warrior–he was mixed Hawaiian, Filipino, and Spanish from Spain.
I introduced myself as an energy healer, a Reiki Master, and I said in addition to my tissue work, if he wanted to do energy work on me too, I was okay with it.
He was surprised! He isn’t trained in it, but many people tell him they feel it. He thinks it’s from his Mixed Martial Art Fighting he used to do. Or was it that other thing where people like, fight–whatever it was, I once gave anesthesia to a patient who was a pro at that. He was gorgeous, super good shape, and had a disease I could catch if I got a needle stick from him.
And Hanani also worked two jobs. He went to bed at two a.m., and woke up at six a.m. He did this, massage, then for a major bank in some department where they research what happened when things go wrong–hard to understand never mind explain but something very behind the scenes.
I was honest, since he could feel my sore tight muscles, and I said what I did for a living and why those muscle groups hurt. Heads are heavy, and I work with them every day to put breathing tubes in and mask patients. I stand a lot. And I move patients from gurney to OR table and back. I push the gurney to the recovery room too.
Hanani could do incredible energy work without realizing it. And I achieved a very deep state of relaxation…he did a good job with the rest, too.
When it was the end, he took care to make sure I got his attention and he would be waiting for me with the water. He wanted a nice tip. From the doctor. I am intuitive enough to figure that out, no matter how polite and sincere he seemed to be.
I thought, my GOD, this poor man, working such long hours–for what? I know how much at El Fancy Schmantzy day spa the massage therapists make–you pay two hundred an hour for fifty minute massage and access to day spa to El Fancy; the person who massaged you gets perhaps twenty an hour, with no benefits. My ex was a massage therapist. That’s how I know.
I tipped him thirty-five dollars.
When is this financial slavery–having to hold down more than one job to make ends meet–going to end?
Sit Down Carla
I was enjoying my one day off, my morning really, before my boy came back from a birthday celebration with his other side of the family. Ross told me to sit in the old glider rocker from when I had our son. I did.
He showed me a picture. It was our home. I was serving dinner, and minding the toddler, our girl, Alexandra. Ross had that same happy, content, mystified look on his face as I did my work in the kitchen. I see that look sometimes even here in my home. He just stands in the dining room and looks into the kitchen with this funny smile, as I go do my thing getting dinner ready. I feel Ross’ happiness even now.
Well in this vision, Ross sat at the head of the table, and all of the every day normal things were going on, and it was a beautiful picture of balance and harmony and bliss. I teased Ross, giving him a little sass just so he would know that even though I was doing all these things I was the Essene well-trained spiritual powerhouse I was, no matter HOW it may look at the moment.
It was bliss.
Ross shared that this was the night before I gave birth to our son, whom he gave away, because of political concerns he agreed to keep the bloodline ‘safe’ by having another family raise him, and tell me he died at birth.
Ross said it was the best day he ever had of his entire existence, that day, that dinner, that moment he shared with me right then…and he wished with all his heart he could have had just one more day like that…and he was so sorry for what he did to me, to us, to destroy forever that love and trust that our family once shared.
I started crying too. I held his head in my arms, and rocked him. I told him that everything happens for the best, and here we are now, together. And I wished we could have had that one more night with our family back then too, for I loved it very much, all of it. And if I had to go through the loss to get to now, it was worth it. I didn’t blame him. I understood, And I wanted him to know I had forgiven him without a doubt, forever.
We weren’t alone in this meditation. I knew we were monitored. But to my surprise, it was by three tall thin beings with very elongated heads who were not our skin color, more of an olive, brown, reptile like skin with big eyes–Anunaki.
They were crying too. They were the initial guardians who were assigned to earth. Then they ‘fell’ of whatever you want to call it–got into ‘money and power’. Ross and I were part of the ‘lets set things right’ team. That mission failed miserably. Since then, the leader Anunaki became good. Their minions here on earth aren’t so nice.
I am HORRIFIED of them. I started to panic. I rock in fetal position and hit myself in their presence, trying to make them go away. I reminded everyone I have a restraining order against them–they are not to come near me. Through a glass wall, I showed them my many, many scars on my person, from their choices, and that I don’t want the healing to become off-track by any interactions with them.
They had gifts for me. Many. I didn’t want to accept them. I didn’t trust the gifts. I knew these three were contrite, more or less. But I didn’t want reminders. I asked my higher self to scan the gifts, and agreed to take one, the one that was the darkest color. A rectangle black the size of a cell phone in a case.
It was their history. They wanted their story, complete with the ending with them turning good, for our posterity to know.
I thanked them. And I also pointed to the middle one and said, ‘That one does not know what Love is. I forgive you all. Completely. And when the time comes, this one in the middle–I pointed–will be asked to forgive. It is only at that time when the forgiveness takes place that he will understand what Love really is. ‘ (the middle one still had extreme love of money, and was hiding it. Loved power, too, I sensed it)
Then in a flash, I realized how silly this all is, my having the glass and the restraining order–the one on the left, and the one on the right, were good. No matter what happened between us, we are Ohana in some way like it or not. So I ran to them, threw my arms around their necks, and said how sorry I was everything had happened. I will excuse myself to concentrate on my own healing, but I wished them all blessings and good luck on their new missions, and encouraged them to remember me in their meditations and their growth.
Then Ross said I needed to change the sheets on the beds back in 3D! I am not the best housekeeper, and he said it would help our boy’s self-esteem if I made the beds really nice for us when he came home. Not just the boy’s room, but mine too. So I did. And it looked nice.
Mana Patrice (a hybrid name my boy came up with, ‘mama’ and ‘nana’ combined) turned sixty. It was a BIG birthday. She came with her grandson to pick me up. We drove quite a ways to Laguna Beach, for lunch. There was a wait for a table. So we stopped by some little art stores.
She doesn’t know who Ross is. Just that I am in a relationship. Well, when we went to the Russian Traditions store, there was his face! on the nesting dolls! I was like, cool! She owns an internet business, and she spoke with the owner of the store. Did you know that people won’t ship to Brazil because people say ‘it never arrived’? Like all the time? They want refunds.
And some places they won’t ship, because there is no insurance for it–it’s strange how some countries, Russia is one, are like that.
We got a beautiful table, ate lunch, and relaxed. Except for the Time Share part. They have two, and she offered to give us one. Its not the way we travel–the advance planning and keeping track of points, the requesting a time slot–all would be stress for me. Even through it’s only a service fee every year. I declined…they had offered to sell it to me before, and I asked my mom, who said, ‘it’s a bad business deal right now’. Dad bought one in Palm Springs, and our points expire, we pay fees, once when I took mom, we got bed bugs–it was a nightmare.
After that I gave Mana my gifts. Her grandson had given her two pandora charms–Ross picked out the four leaf clover one–and our boy picked the Angels Baseball. That was yesterday and she thought that was everything.
Today I gave her a pink gold heart. This is a big birthday for a woman who whenever the boy gets sick, watches him all day, so I can work. She is driving me to my medical procedure this month. We are joined by our love of this child we share as mom and Mana.
I also gave her my letter with my confession about the lawyers, and the ceramic handprint ornament for her bedroom wall.
She forgave me for everything.
She said if she had been in my place she would have done the same thing.
I was bawling. I was so thankful we could put the past behind us, together, forever.
And I saw, that I am her daughter she never had. My love for her son, brought her the grandson she always wanted, and me. She was so excited for her birthday.
Then they wanted to show me one last store, the garden shop. I like little ceramic mushroom ornaments, and she has given me some. I found a sky blue one with white blotches on it, like clouds.
My eye caught a plate. It was ceramic and on a stand to hold it on display. It had beautiful paint, and said, SHALOM both in English and in Hebrew. My eyes grew WIDE with delight! Ross! (we were both Jewish AND Essene). I bought them both. And I shared how my ‘friend’ is Jewish…
Then I saw two cards–Bells Will Ring and Happily Ever After. Then one more as I walked out the door caught my eye, ‘I LOVE YOU…’
He had the haircut, and now he needed a shirt. We went to a mall and ate at the food court. I had thai, and my son had mexican. Then the search began. Ross was helping us, guiding both of us. Our boy hears him just like me.
We went to the Macy’s Men’s Store. And found shirts at seventy percent off. But they were hard to try on. I had to teach for the first time about the pins, and the collar stays.
Our son is also the reincarnation of my Nanu Filippo–and oddly enough, as we searched, the SAME STYLE of shirts that once looked good on my grandfather, looked good on my kid.
Short sleeve dress shirts. In the same colors and styles. The long sleeves looked terrible on him.
Even more fascinating, a mannequin by the dressing room, was the same height and build as Ross!
Anyhow, everything went fine except I was ready to go home long before ‘the shirt’ was found.
When I got home I was upset and cranky. The air conditioner costs a fortune. It was cool out. I wanted to turn it off. My boy likes the house like a refrigerator, and that costs me way lots of money. Then I got upset over how much I have to do tomorrow–take him to my mom (to see cousins too), then work.
I complained to my son how I am not angry with him, I just am feeling guilty that I can’t be just a mom, or just a doctor, or just a healer like I am here. I feel stretched and unable to give it my best.
So I tucked him in, and pulled out my computer. I wanted to WRITE. When you are a writer, you HAVE TO WRITE. It’s like needing a glass of water. It’s a physical NEED. Why, I don’t know, but after the day with Mana and the shopping and watering the plants and feeding animals, I wanted some ‘me’ time.
I pulled a Hawaiian Mana Card (mana in Hawaiian means ‘life force’) and pulled ‘ANO ‘ANO. It means ‘seed’ and represents intention. The card is all about manifesting. As Serge King says, ‘Where attention goes, energy flows’.
Then my boy had a nightmare. He kept hearing his Mana calling to him by name, over and over and over. He wanted me to lie with him. So I did.
I had the chance to ‘do over’, and to BE a mom, just for tonight. I could always write my whole life. But tonight, just for now, he’s a nine-year old kid, my son, and he needs his mom. That won’t last forever…
Carla has just about covered everything in a powerful three-part article for you. The first is about the generosity in the face of extreme lack, about a healer who once assaulted people for ‘sport’. The healing won out–(smiles knowingly)–and the professional career in MMA didn’t work out. It is all for the highest good. She also makes the point that even healers need healing, and it would be good to incorporate some practice in addition to the daily self-reiki and meditation, to help with your own spiritual advancement.
In the next, Carla gains not only an ally and friend, but today both women saw the power of Creator in how we weave our lives–they are now mother and daughter, officially, in agreement with one another. The air is clear. Carla realizes that a human relationship with family–is worth more than any treasure in her house which could be of value to her. It is with joy she gave her treasure to someone who would cherish it as deeply as her. And her mother, Patrice, realized that she was sent two hearts to console her, to surprise her, and to cherish her, when her sons and husband instead watched sports while ‘celebrating’ her Big Birthday at home with Italian takeout and not really paying that much attention to her, the woman to both ran the home and supported the family for her entire career!
Finally, Carla is working on her own power to manifest in 5D. Carla pops neatly in and out of it, as displayed by the anunaki meditation, and our own moving forward together from our past. With her son, it ended on a higher note than perhaps it would have had the ‘ANO ‘ANO card and the ‘nightmare’ had not been sent.
So pay attention to what comes your way–it is in fact, ‘lessons’ of great worth and beauty and value to the soul. Always remember the tears that Carla shed at the beautiful Cliff restaurant at Laguna Beach, tears from her heart, at the wanting forgiveness and then the joy at being given it completely. The soul acts like this. All of them do. Every time when they are learning a new lesson, and everything is going right on one of the harder assignments, at its completion.
I wish you all a beautiful Sunday, and I want you to honor your families and your loved ones, just for the day. They are some of the best teachers who have been sent to you by Creator, to assist you to learn the most important lessons for this life, and for those beyond.
Aloha and Mahalos,
Ross and the beautiful, if sleepy, Carla
Your Reiki Doc Unit
(we are interchangeable–winks)